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[27 Apr 2004|05:55pm]

Prom was AWSOME...

I haven't hung out with my bff's in FOEVER.. (show the love)

I think im ready to commit to willie when he comes back :-)

<3 <3 <3

10 orgasms - squelch!

YUMMMM ...... Orange Juice! [20 Apr 2004|05:42pm]
[ mood | I HAVE TO PEE! ]

Bitter sweet feelings about this weekend.  Friday was SOOOO fun.  I was actually impressed with The Fall Semester...and the after party was...well...haha... an experience (ladies we LOVE orange juice)  Then on Sunday my parents cut me open with words again... they told that after I graduate they want me out of their lives... so... I get to move in with Irene for the summer... WOOP WOOP... With all the negativity that surrounds my parents and my relationship I've come to the conclusion that I truly can't care anymore.  Caring just makes me upset, hurt, and disappointed in myself.. even though I know its not my fault that things are the way they are... they make me feel that it is... SO... I'll just leave it alone cause ill be gone in 1 month!

This weekend had mos def cemented me, laura, and irene's realationship. I love those ladies more than anything. They make me feel like i actually matter to someone.  WE ARE SOO BFF!!!!!!!!! haha

Well this weekend is prom... and this is my dress


But yeah so im excited.. it should lift my spirts!

<3 <3 <3----- uhhh.. DEATH CAB ON MONDAY!!!!!!!

7 orgasms - squelch!

A dark night, without a flashlight! [15 Apr 2004|05:37pm]
[ mood | deafeated ]

So that last few days have been some of the most heart breaking days of my life. And I don't mean in the boy department! On Monday night I finally got the balls to show my parents my piercing.... initally my mom just blew it off. And i was like "score, maybe i can really get away with this".... yeah more like "score, this is gonna be the experience that truly shows you how much your parents dont give a shit about you"

When i failed to take out my peircing, my parents approached me on Tuesday night and in a nutshell this is what they said:
"Take that shit out of your lip NOW or you can keep that in your lip while your finding another place to live..... Nicky, what are you doing to yourself, ur fucking white trash now. Your hair looks like shit, you live like a fucking pig, and now ur face looks like shit. You used to be a pretty girl but you keep doing things that prove your trashy. We never thought that this is how you would turn out, your just a rebellious and angry girl."

so i said "ok", shut the door and cried for like the 2nd time this year!

I can't explain what it is like to know that now matter what you do, your parents will never compliment me, unless it is in a negative fashion..... i dont know.. i just want people to care. I want a reason to wake up in the morning! I want someone to love me...and not necessarly in the sexual way... just to be loved!

**** Thank you Laura for listening to me and letting me come out to dinner with you and your family, your a great friend, i heart you!****

well, i need something fun to do this weekend!... to boost my spirts... tell me if you wanna hang out...

<3 <3 <3

6 orgasms - squelch!

I have a hole in my face, FINALLY! [11 Apr 2004|08:54pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

I GOT MY MONROE PIERCED!!!!!!!!!! Yeah so I have decided the scene is full of complete assholes and the only reason people are going to shows now a days is to strut their shit!... Enough said. Scarlet is soooooo good. I heart them. *i had an arial view of the screamer's butt crack after their set* AILD, ETID, and Black Dahlia Murder shredded! This weekend was fun. And now we wait (irene and I for Jason to come over) If im the third wheel, im just gonna get drunk off her dad's beer....!

10 orgasms - squelch!

[05 Apr 2004|10:12pm]
[ mood | content ]

P-A-R-T-Y.... because I gotta!

This weekend was fun.

Friday: Irene and I went and saw Verae at the Asylum. Then we went to Ihop... HA.. and Irene squirt cream in Michael's hair... oh god it was funny!... It was more funny cause I dont think either of them knew how to react to it!

Saturday: At first it was a meaningless day of shopping! Then I was excited cause Irene, James and I were all going to go to the art festival on Main Street in Dallas. Well Irene and I drive to Arlington to meet James.. but the buttface wouldn't answer his phone!!! (errr) SO Irene just ate a shitload of 99 cent tacos! :-)

Well then Irene and I drove ALL the way home and James called me and was like "PLEASE DONT BE PISSED"... but it was sweet cause to make up for it he came and drove to my house at like 12!! -- we all hung out and James and I had some cool conversation. We have SOOOO much in common, it is scary!

Sunday: Irene and I went to the art festival, it was alright.. but Irene bought the SEXIEST sunglasses.. I envy them! Then the gay man that worked at the store told me my sunglasses were " umm nice"...

so yeah, the time changed messed me up, im tired, but happy, and the arab man that works at the convenient store in Rhome told me I was a "pretty girl"... humm at least someone thinks so!

HODDIE HOTTIES--- "trap uglies"

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

3 orgasms - squelch!

[30 Mar 2004|05:32pm]
[ mood | blah ]


--- Yeah we do it like the black girls straight outta Compton. ---

This weekend was eventful. In a nutshell... I went to 2 shows, hung out with Laura and Irene, and realized what a vulnerable little girl I am.

I also got told that I'm "always seem angry". (cool huh?!) But you know what, I think I realized why I always feel like there is cloud keeping the sun from shinning.... I think that I care too much, I expect too much, and I'm way too jealous. Honestly, I think jealousy is what creates a fire in my soul. And this is why I always feel alone! Recently, more than not I wish to be someone different, posses a different quality, or completely change someone's perception of me. I break down in utter disappointment every time I think about the life I lead. I'm lost in a sea of dirty water and I really don't know how to escape! All I wish is to be happy!

<3 <3 <3

3 orgasms - squelch!

What does it mean? [26 Mar 2004|03:00pm]
[ mood | excited ]

So lately I have been having these really strange dreams about the most random crap ever!?!?!

-I really don't know what that means, I just hope I'm not dying. If anyone is into interpreting dreams, let me know.

Everyone have a GREAT weekend!

2 orgasms - squelch!

HOW FUCKING HOT IS MY JOURNAL? [23 Mar 2004|05:54pm]
[ mood | happy ]

... k so yeah... my journal is SO HOT!... it makes me cream!

Im so happy right now, for numerous reasons.
1) No more Dr. Staley
2) I have a crush
3) Irene is happy
4) Last night was fun
5) I think this weekend will be better!

Have you ever thought about what u take pictures of? I watched this movie this weekend which pointed out how people usually just take pictures of happy moments. Pictures are there to "freeze" time, to prove that at one point in your life someone thought you special enough to take a picture of!

Im out!

4 orgasms - squelch!

Spooning IS hot! [20 Mar 2004|08:11am]
[ mood | tired ]

Woop woop... so lets see here

Life has been happy lately. I'm glad to say.

I've been to a few parties, one including Max's where Jon Erik kicked like 3 holes in the wall, a boy puked all over the floor, and i drew a penis on Sean's face (that was funny).

Awww... but last night was SUPER hot. Irene and i went over to Matt Ross's house with Cole, Michael, and this guy Austin. We watched this crazy movie about drag queens called Party Monster. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT! Then we went up stairs and just sat around and Michael read us a Bearstiens Bear book while Matt serenaded along with the story! Then I got this crazy idea that we should all go lay in the bed of my truck... yeah and so we ended up staying up ALL night (from 1-7am) just talking and yes... SPOONING... it was hot! i promise. It was the first time i really hung out with all those guys... and they are all really nice. We are all definately gonna all hang out again.

Show are coming like a bat out of hell.... but I guess that's nothing new.

Alright well im out... yeah it's 8:30 and i havent slept at ALL...

2 orgasms - squelch!

[15 Mar 2004|05:17pm]
[ mood | lonely ]



Friday: I worked.  Then Canada was having a party so I went over there.  Man I found out something really awful about someone I really care about.  (but my lips are sealed)  Honestly I really wish I would have never found out.  I don't think it was fair that they told me this.... they were drunk.

Saturday:  Slept.  Did Laundry.  Went to Starbucks.  & went to Max's.  Jon Erik put a hole in the wall... THAT WAS FUNNY.  This night was really kinda interesting... it made me realize a LOT of things.  Things that I had realized a LONG time ago that were lost in the trace of time.  But everything happens for a reason.  I guess you could say it was a night of laughter and lust.

Sunday: Just hung out.

Monday: Today is a really hard day.  I can't explain how I feel.  Everytime I try to think about everything in my life right now, it makes me cry.  So instead, I don't think about it, and my conscience starts to go crazy and I just get angry... I really feel lonley.  I don't have anyone to understand how I feel, no one to talk to, no one to care!

Well im out.... Nicky<3

3 orgasms - squelch!

[12 Mar 2004|05:15pm]
Soon all the joy that pours from everything makes fountains of your eyes because you finally understand the movement of a hand waving you good-bye.
1 orgasm - squelch!

[10 Mar 2004|01:29pm]
[ mood | pleased ]

.. AWW this weekend was hot. pimped it with irene and laura. O.P.O. ( i heart u guys) we will do it again this weekend, my parents are going camping again.

The Daughters show was SOOO hot... the Chinese Stars are so happy. The singer was really drunk and he was dancing around the stage playing the cow bell and humping the amp.. saying " i have the BEST moooves in this place".. it was fun. & Daughters is always the sex.

k.. one question.. what is with the doctor masks.?.. call me a douche but i dont understand.

 ... oh and thank you Jon Erik.. that drink was orgasmic!

Tomorrow..... NORMA JEAN, UnderOath, Beloved, Dead Poetic... I CAN'T WAIT!!

1 orgasm - squelch!

People need to mind their OWN fucking business!!!! [03 Mar 2004|05:08pm]
[ mood | pissed/angry/depressed/hurt ]

yeah ok, so saturday night i went to the show at the DOOR in FW!... in was cool... irene introduced me to matt... he he.. he's a cuttie :-)... and then she gave away her digits to MICHAEL.. woop woop... but then here is where the shit hits the roof... ok so i left the show early and went to hang out with Willie cause he came in town. well there was some drinking and so on. Well then willie passes out and Willie's friend Travis was hitting on me... which harmless flirting is ok... and its not even like willie and i are an OFFICIAL couple... but nevertheless... NOTHING happened... and then i come to find out this fucking dike air force girl that i have only met once (which was at the party)... is talking all this shit saying something happened between Travis and I... and the fucked up thing is the girl wasn't even around me... she was kissing the fucking toilet like the last 3 hours of the party... but whatever... and now Willie is gonna get all involved and start to not trust me... which we have agreed on an open relationship anyway!... so FUCK EVERYONE !!!!!!!!!ERRR... see i hate this fucking shit... when people start drama... and NOW i have to talk to Willie about it.... and yeah.... FUCK EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!

--- yeah and i cut my finger at work... and like there is now like 4 layers of flesh on the cabinet.. YUM!

Yeah and today is my Dad's birthday... i got him a key to the house with the dallas cowboys logo... he was happy!...(suprising what old people enjoy!)

Well it is my last day of school... Spring Break has begun... Woo fucking hoo!... it better not be lame... i need something to make me happy... Willie is coming but right now i dont really want to see him.. (that's sad cause its not even its fault)
SO IF ANYONE HAS ANY IDEAS..... let me know.... and if anyone wants to hang out... uh... let me know...

Alright... im out, see ya in the pit. NICKY

2 orgasms - squelch!

FIGURES! [27 Feb 2004|02:15pm]
[ mood | sick ]

Info Black
Your Heart is Black

What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla


[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<well [...] reassuring!!>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/X/xdeadxstarx/1044037678_turesBlack.jpg" border="0" alt="Info Black"><br>Your Heart is Black
<br><br><a href="http://quizilla.com/users/xdeadxstarx/quizzes/What%20Color%20is%20Your%20Heart%3F%20/"> <font size="-1">What Color is Your Heart? </font></a><BR> <font size="-3">brought to you by <a href="http://quizilla.com">Quizilla</a></font>

b<Well that is Reassuring!!>b

woop woop!.. willie is coming down this weekend... I <3 him!!.. but im sick so that is shitty.. oh well... bwahahaha

Saturday is the nightlife/enjoy the fall/ the knockout kings!!! --door, FW

and my fat ass has a sudden urge to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich!!!

<3... im out.. see ya in the pit!

stole this from Michael! [24 Feb 2004|05:32pm]
[ mood | peaceful... ]

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
2. Am I lovable?
3. How long have you known me?
4. When and how did we first meet?
5. What was your first impression?
6. Do you still think that way about me now?
7. What do you think my weakness is?
8. Do you think I'll get married?
9. What makes me happy?
10. What makes me sad?
11. What reminds you of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. How well do you know me?
14. When's the last time you saw me?
15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
16. Do you think I could kill someone?
17. Describe me in one word.
18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger, weaker, or staying the same?
19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
20. Are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what I say about you?

1 orgasm - squelch!

WOOP WOOP! [23 Feb 2004|12:43pm]
[ mood | content ]

SO yeah, this weekend was really really fun! On Friday night Irene and I went to the Bouncing Souls/ Hot Water Music show. It was so much fun, i forgot how much i missed being in a punk pit. Yeah i definately kicked some ass. Then on Saturday, Irene and i went to the Mae/Copeland/Working Title/Slow Day Coming show. It was weird to.. i ran into Micheal and Zach ( two boys i met at the Thursday show... AWWW.. they are cutties :-) ) We also went to Four Star, but irene's hottie wasnt there... DOnt worry ... well get him to love u!!! THEN on sunday, irene and i went to the BEST place in the world. Souper Salad... we are so going there every weekend and we EXPECT all the hot hardcore vegan hotties to show up!!! alright well im out...

2 orgasms - squelch!

Who would have thought?!?! [18 Feb 2004|05:26pm]
[ mood | ALIVE ]

Yeah, so not that i didnt think it before, but this weekend solidified the fact that i am SOOO in love. After a year of dating on an off, i've come to realize that i have never had stronger feelings for anyone in my entire life. When we are together it just feels so right. I couldn't imagine being with anyone else. It's like when he is gone... i have good days, and bad; but when he is here, everything is perfect. "it doesn't matter if 2 people are perfect, just as long as they are perfect for each other.".... William Kinpp... I LOVE U!!!!

1 orgasm - squelch!

HOT DAMN!! [12 Feb 2004|05:57pm]
Thought i'd leave you with this for the weekend... enjoy it.. suckass!

Kinky and fun, you know how to scream and you sure know how to have one hell of a party!! And one hell of a night . . .
Congratulations! You're a screaming orgasm!!

What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

WOO HOO! [12 Feb 2004|05:28pm]
[ mood | amused ]



[11 Feb 2004|05:47pm]
01 | willie
02 | oliver
03 | psh. myself
01 | Music
02 | shows
03 | hot boys
01 | High School
02 | dr. staley
03 | people who THINK they know what their talking about
01 | god
02 | boys
03 | herpes!( haha)
01 | phone
02 | pens
03 | paper
01 | talking on aim
02 | writing this shit
03 | talking on the phone
01 | fall in love
02 | go to europe
03 | ride an elephant
01 | write
02 | read
03 | listen
01 | blunt
02 | loud
03 | funny
01 | play an instrment
02 | find a hot guy!
03 | sing
01 | death cab for cuite
02 | belle and sebastian
03 | the cure
01 | anyone othere than urself
02 | the pres.
03 | mickey mouse
01 | that's rad
02 | shit
03 | boys suck
01 | pizza
02 | ramen noodles
03 | twisty string cheese (OH WOW.. MOZZERELLA & CHEDDAR!)
01 | how to play piano
02 | history of music
03 | how to make a BUTTload of money really fast
01 | water
02 | water
03 | dr. pepper
01 | alf
02 | simpsons
03 | reading rainbow

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